Cats In Command

05:30 hours- Open the door to find Commander Frank Sinatra and Sergeant Snog waiting. Any delay results in insistent cat scratching at door. 08:00 hours- After my morning run, Sergeant Snog leads way to bathroom, where she carefully inspects shaving routine. After showering, Commander Frank scrutinizes bathtub. Occasionally licks off water droplets. 08:15 hours- I would think feeding them first would buy me some breathing room, but this is futile. Sergeant Snog does weaving drills between my feet as I make coffee, and Commander Frank stands guard at table, ready to rid world of stray bacon or toast bits. (Soldier’s note: My wife reports no such incidents in her morning routine.) 17:00 hours- Return home to find cats off duty, but my work is not done. A feather on a string doesn’t fly itself, the look on their faces say. 21:00 hours-Time to rest. With Frank purring and kneading my lap and Snog asleep on my feet, I know it’s been all worth it.